How Can Long-Distance Caregivers Help Loved Ones?

A recent article noted that long-distance caregivers have the same concerns and pressures as local caregivers, perhaps even more. They spend about twice as much on caregiving as people caring for a loved one nearby, because they’re more likely to need to hire help, take uncompensated time off work and pay for travel. A huge challenge for this group is just staying informed and assured that the person needing care is in good hands. As a result, long-distance caregivers must have good communication and a solid team on the ground.

AARP’s recent article entitled “Long-Distance Caregiving: 5 Key Steps to Providing Care From Afar” provides us with five steps to staying informed and effective as a long-distance caregiver and thoughts for implementing the measures.

  1. Be sure you have access to information. Having a means of receiving good information and possessing legal authority to make financial and health-care decisions is critical for all primary caregivers, but it’s even greater for ones caring from a distance. Arrange as much as you can during an in-person visit.
  • Start the discussion on finances and map out with your loved one how to pay for health care and everyday expenses.
  • Ask whether your parent or other senior is able to sign the forms or make the calls necessary to give doctors, hospitals and insurers permission to share information with you or another trusted family member. This should include banks and utilities.
  • Be sure the senior has designated a durable power of attorney for health care and financial decisions.
  • Know what to do in an emergency, as far as access to the home by a neighbor, if needed.
  1. Create your on-the-ground support team. Don’t try to do it all, especially if your loved one has more serious or complicated health issues. In addition to healthcare professionals, ask friends, family and community groups to join a network of caregiving helpmates. Remember to add your loved one as part of the team.
  • Assign roles and tasks, that the members of the team are willing and able to do.
  • Create a list with contact info for everyone and keep it up to date.
  1. Consider hiring a reputable caregiving professional. They’re often called a geriatric care manager, aging life care manager, or eldercare navigator or coordinator. These professionals are frequently licensed nurses or social workers who can also be valuable mediators or sounding boards, when family members disagree on care decisions.
  • Verify the person’s professional certifications, see how long the person has been in the field and request references.
  • Care managers can charge $50 to $200 an hour. Medicare doesn’t cover this service, nor do most health insurance plans. However, if you can handle it financially, an experienced manager may be able to save your family time, money and stress with even a short call.
  1. Find ways to communicate regularly with your local support group and loved one. You should leverage technology. With permission, place video monitors, wearable activity trackers, remote door locks to prevent wandering (if the care recipient has dementia) and even electronic pill dispensers that can tell you if someone has taken the prescribed medications.
  2. Leverage your visits. Nothing’s better than an in-person visit. When you can manage one, come with a list of things you need to know or discuss.
  • Interview possible home aides or house cleaners or meet with social workers or other professionals involved in your loved one’s care to discuss any concerns.
  • Look for signs of abuse, which means monitoring your senior’s checking account and see if there are any irregularities and look for red flags of physical or emotional mistreatment, like bruises, unexplained injuries, or a sudden change in personality. Note if your family member talks about a person you’ve never met who visits often and has been “very helpful.”

Although you may have several practical tasks to tick off your list, it’s important to spend quality time with your loved one. And seek the advice of a qualified elder law attorney, if you have any questions.

Reference: AARP (Oct. 30, 2019) “Long-Distance Caregiving: 5 Key Steps to Providing Care From Afar”

How Did Alzheimer’s Impact the Estate Planning of These Famous People?

Forbes’ recent article, “Top 7 Celebrity Estates Impacted By Alzheimer’s Disease” looks at seven celebrity estates that were affected by Alzheimer’s disease.

  1. Rosa Parks. The civil rights icon died at 92 in 2005. She was suffering from Alzheimer’s disease. Legal battles over her estate continue to this day. Her estate plan left her assets to a charitable institution she created. However, her nieces and nephews challenged the validity of her will and trust, due to her mental deficiencies and allegations of undue influence. That claim was settled, but there have been fights over broken deals and leaked secrets, claimed mismanagement of her estate and assets, allegations of bribery and corruption and a battle over Rosa’s missing coat that she wore at the time of her famous arrest at the Alabama bus stop in 1955.
  2. Gene Wilder. Wilder’s widow–his fourth wife, Karen–and his adopted daughter didn’t fight over Gene’s estate after he died, which shows good estate planning. Wilder makes the list because of how his widow used her husband’s struggle—which she kept private while he was alive—to bring attention to the terrible disease, including permitting his Willy Wonka character to be used in a campaign to raise awareness.
  3. Aaron Spelling. The Hollywood producer left behind a reported fortune worth $500 million. His death certificate listed Alzheimer’s disease as a contributing factor. Spelling changed his estate plan just two months before he died, reducing the share to his daughter, actress Tori, and his son, Randy, to $800,000 each.
  4. Etta James. Legendary blues singer Etta James passed away in 2012, at 73. Her family said she had been struggling with Alzheimer’s disease for several years, and her illness ignited an ugly court battle between her husband of more than 40 years and her son from a prior relationship, over the right to make her medical and financial decisions, including control of her $1 million account. Her husband, Artis Mills, alleged that the power of attorney she signed appointing her son as decision-maker was invalid, because she was incompetent when she signed it. Mills sued for control of the money to pay for Etta’s care. After some litigation, Etta’s leukemia was determined to be fatal, which led to a settlement. Mills was granted conservatorship and permitted to control sums up to $350,000 to pay for Etta’s care for the last few months of her life.
  5. Peter Falk. The Lieutenant Columbo actor died at 83 in 2011, after living with Alzheimer’s disease for years. His wife Shera and his adopted daughter Catherine fought in court for conservatorship to make his decisions. Shera argued that she had power of attorney and could already legally make Peter’s decisions for him, which included banning daughter Catherine from visits. The judge granted Shera conservatorship, but ordered a visitation schedule for Catherine. However, a doctor, who testified at the hearing, said that Falk’s memory was so bad that he probably wouldn’t even remember the visits.
  6. Tom Benson. The billionaire owner of the New Orleans Saints and Pelicans was the subject of a lengthy and bitter court battle over control of his professional sports franchises, and hundreds of millions of dollars of other assets. Prior trusts, that he and his late wife established, left the sports franchises and other business interests to his daughter and two grandchildren. One of granddaughters operated the Saints as lead owner, until she was fired by her grandfather. Tom decided to take the controlling stock of the teams out of the trust and substitute other assets in their place, taking over control of the teams. However, his daughter and grandchildren fought the move. A 2015 court ruling declared Benson to be competent, despite allegations he suffered from Alzheimer’s disease. Benson then changed his will and trust and left everything to his third wife, Gayle. They all settled the dispute in 2017, leaving other assets to the daughter and grandchildren—but ultimately leaving Gayle in control of the Saints and Pelicans, after Benson’s death in 2018 at age 90.
  7. Glen Campbell. Campbell’s 2007 estate plan left out three of his adult children. They sued to challenge their disinheritance after he died. They dropped the case in 2018, without receiving a settlement. The fact that Campbell’s final will was drafted several years prior to his Alzheimer’s diagnosis was a critical factor in the outcome of the lawsuit.

The estate planning of these celebrities show the importance of proper estate planning, before it is too late. Wills and trusts that are created or changed after someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, or similar conditions are more apt to be challenged in court.

Reference: Forbes (November 25, 2019) “Top 7 Celebrity Estates Impacted By Alzheimer’s Disease”